Tuesday, January 7, 2014

The Holidays

I took a hiatus from coming here over the holidays. I didn't write, I didn't read any of the blogs I follow. The plan was to find out I was pregnant on New Year's Eve, maybe earlier. I wouldn't even announce it here--just quietly delete this blog and slip out the infertility community. I would pretend to all my friends and family that we had always planned to get pregnant now, and never tell anyone we'd actually been trying almost two years.

On Christmas Eve, I got a surprise.

We were getting ready to go to the Christmas Eve service at church--dressing up, doing pretty hair for pictures, all the traditional stuff. I went to the bathroom shortly after supper to find my thong filled with blood.

Yup. Merry Christmas to me.

My cycle was 25 days long. No warning cramps, no bloating, no icky period feeling. After several months of 35-50 day cycles, this one was suddenly short and without any warning. And I was in the home of my single, never married, 63-year-old aunt.

Luckily, I found a tampon in my makeup bag, but I had to keep on my bloody underwear for the Christmas service--I didn't have much other choice, plus I'd already made it that far. What the bloody hell, right?

Though I am not proud of what I did next.

I still had to figure out something for overnight. I'm kind of sensitive, so I can't use tampons over night. I found a small panty liner in my suitcase (I have backup stuff shoved all over my traveling things, just never what I really need!), but I didn't have any extra underwear other than one thong to wear on Christmas Day.

Well...while I was getting ready for bed, I snuck into my aunt's room and "borrowed" some of her underwear. They were pretty much what you would imagine a single, 63-year-old woman wears. I cannot even explain how much Bobby made fun of me that night. But I am nothing if not resourceful.

I got through the holidays, and I'm currently on cycle day 15, so of course we're back to marathon sex sessions. It's also been in the -30s out, so I'm pretty sure we're not alone in that.

I had a doctor appointment on Jan. 2, and the first words out her mouth when she came in were, "Still not pregnant? Let's see what we can do." It was comforting, but nothing was really solved. She wants Bobby to get his sperm tested and for us to keep trying for 4-6 more months. That makes sense since my cycles are just starting to become regulated. I'm feeling better about our timing. If nothing happens in the next 4-6 months, she'll refer me to an RE. Apparently we'd only have to travel about 45 minutes, but that's still not very convenient.

I'm not sure we're ready for treatments yet. We're not quite there. Bobby still believes 100 percent that we'll conceive naturally. I hope he's right. Maybe I should listen to him more. He is always the one that's telling me make sure you pack extra underwear...


  1. "Quietly delete this blog and slip out of the infertility community". Now, now, that wouldn't be very nice to those of us following along and who would wonder what happened to you! I'm sorry that the holidays didn't bring you your bfp though. Hilarious that you borrowed underwear from your aunt! Lol. Your plan going forward sounds like a good one. Have you thought about trying clomid?

    1. My doctor seemed really against Clomid...she said she was worried about over-stimulating me and causing too many eggs and multiples. I thought that was pretty strange, especially since my ovulation is obviously irregular. I'm really thinking about getting a second opinion about this though. It seems like each cycle is such a crapshoot right now.

  2. If you're ready, I'd get a second opinion. Do you have to have a referral to see the RE? Seeing an RE is my next big step, but I'm scared and putting it off because of the associated costs. Also, please don't slip off...you are the first blogger I've found with such similar circumstances/timeline! KinderCoaster

    1. I don't have a referral yet, but my doctor said she'd give me one whenever I want. Obviously I'm putting that off as long as possible, hoping to get pregnant the free way!

  3. I carry a spare pair of work-out clothes in my car, and I make sure I have an extra pair of undies just in case! Love the resourcefulness!

    Sorry to be a back seat drive, but has your doctor checked fallopian patency with an HSG? I've seen two patients with seemingly no risk factors with non patent tubes recently.

    1. Please--drive away! I'm so ignorant about all of this, I love hearing your opinion. Question, is this something my regular GP would do? She honestly doesn't ever "do" anything when I go--just physical exams and pap smear. Should I see an obgyn at my clinic for something like this, or do I need to jump right to an RE? I don't have an RE anywhere close to town, and my doctor said she'd refer me to Mayo Clinic (Rochester) when the time comes, but that isn't exactly a short trip.